Caggie Dunlop: Why three in a bed is not my crowd
Recently, a gorgeous girl approached me as I sipped a beer at an über-trendy bar with a group of friends.
As she sashayed over — all rock girl hair, jeans and attitude — I felt us pale by “cool” comparison. But as she arrived beside us, rather than putting in an order with the barman, it was, in fact, me she had a request for.
“Me and my boyfriend are looking for a little fun tonight,” she mouthed over the music. “And we wondered whether you’d like to help us out?”
I stared blankly back into her kohl-lined eyes, confused. Did she think I was some sort of upper-class drug dealer? “I’m sorry, I don’t think I can help you get hold of that sort of fun,” I eventually mumbled, much to my friends’ amusement.
Her eyes laughed back at me and my awkward response, before she leaned in to whisper in my ear. “No, I meant, a different kind of fun … we’ll be over there, if you’re interested.” And with that, she sauntered off to an equally cool, achingly beautiful boy in the corner.
As fantasy hit, I have to admit I found her offer intriguing. As yet, I’ve never taken a third wheel to bed — and if I was ever going to, surely this was my perfect opportunity.
“Caggie,” my friend Jamie, a regular three-wayer, insisted, “You’ve. Got. To. Go. For. It.”
I found myself half-nodding in response, as my eyes focused on the tangled denim-clad limbs in the corner.
I’d always fantasised that if I took the plunge it would be with a couple, with a gorgeous girl and guy. The thought of two men at once judging my naked form is my worst nightmare, and — to be honest — well out of my sexual comfort zone.
But while there’s just something so XXX about two guys and a girl, the opposite composition is another matter. However — and whatever your own arrangement, I’m not judging — there is a whole other threesome dilemma to consider: your own prowess.
“I always say, beforehand, ‘I’ll certainly try my best — but I can’t promise I’ll be able to satisfy you both’,” Jamie added, as I mulled over my own proposition.
From the other side of the bar, three was looking like a pretty cool crowd, but tonight it was going to have to stay a fantasy. For now, two is much more my sort of company.
