Top Tables: Richard Herring

Comedian Richard Herrring likes to get his laughing gear around some rib-ticklishly good grub. He tells us where he likes to have a nibble.

Bucci, 195 Balham High Road SW12. Tel: 020 8673 5459. Tube: Balham

It's a great place for an understated date, not show-offy, just good food and a friendly atmosphere. You're close enough to other people's tables to listen to their conversations and laugh at them - but close enough to be punched if you're not subtle enough.

Newtons, 35 Abbeville Road SW4. Tel: 020 8673 0977. Tube: Clapham South

I used to live 20 metres away and never went there - I was young and thought it looked arsey. But since I've moved I regularly pop back - it's now one of my favourites and it's not at all arsey. But maybe now I'm older, I'm just more of an arse.

The Pepper Tree, 19 Clapham Common South Side SW4. Tel: 020 7622 1758.
Tube: Clapham Common

Extremely good Thai food, but it's cheap, because they sit you on benches by long tables and get you in and out as fast as they can. There's usually a queue, but you won't have to wait long. Fun, and the food is spicy and delicious.

Smiley's Cafe, 37 Bedford Hill SW12. Tel: 020 8673 1569. Tube: Balham

This is where I like to go for a good fry-up. I like it for the hopeful quality of the name, as much as for the food, and the staff are cheerful and friendly. Good for egg and chips.

The Italian Kitchen, 43 New Oxford Street W1. Tel: 020 7836 1011. Tube:Tottenham Court Road

I don't really like to leave Balham but if I am ever in town with the lads we like to eat here. I always get drunk when I go there, so can't remember what the food is actually like. But that, if nothing else, is a testament to the efficacy of their booze.

See Richard Herring's Talking Cock on Feb 5, BAC, 176 Lavender Hill SW11, 8pm, £10.75, £6.50 concs. Tel: 020 7223 2223. Rail: Clapham Junction